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也谈标点,语法的应用 (先开个头...慢慢续)
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星子[ANNA]
星子作品集

酷我!I made it!
酷我!I made it!


注册时间: 2004-06-05
帖子: 13192
来自: Toronto

帖子发表于: 星期三 三月 14, 2007 10:18 am    发表主题: 也谈标点,语法的应用 (先开个头...慢慢续) 引用并回复

Two years ago, when I read Emily Dickinson’s poems, I felt them very strange. Yet I was still deeply punched and attracted by them.
I seldom read theory about poetry since my personality was kind of hunting for freedom.
The evidence is very clear, I can dance by myself very well, but if someone teach me how to dance, then I am totally lost. But a few days ago, I borrowed a book “the Art of poetry”, then I found the way what I interpreted Emily Dickinson’s poems was just spontaneous, I was not really sure why I loved them and why she wrote like that. But now with the guide, they seem much deeper and more meaningful. I admire her skills and creativity.

Here I would like to show some examples.

Four Trees--upon a solitary Acre--
Without Design
Or Order, or Apparent Action--
Maintain--

The Sun--upon a Morning meets them--
The Wind--
No nearer Neighbor--have they--
But God--

The Acre gives them--Place--
They--Him--Attention of Passer by--
Of Shadow, or of Squirrel, haply--
Or Boy--

What Deed is Their's unto the General Nature--
What Plan
They severally--retard--or further--
Unknown—

Emily Dickinson’s life was a mystery. This poem is the same. The ending “Unknown—“is very striking, yet peaceful. It shares such deep insight: things just exist and are beyond knowing.

I especially love Dickinson’s vision about life, freedom and truth. She used her unique way to present a world beyond our knowing, remote and solitary….

In this poem, she tried to avoid verb, and used minim puncanations. Instead, she introduced dash. For me, a sign of continuing, yet breaking or halting…

Four trees are observed by a quiet heart and random focus with wondering thoughts.
It seemed to raise questions casually, what deed, what plan… They retard—further unknown…

The idle natural scenes are merely connected by a set of almost unconnected nouns: trees, sun, wind, place, shadow etc. Objects simply appear one beside or after the other and the whole relationship remain unclear.

After reading this poem, I believe readers will be left to pause, wonder and hang on those images… what deed, what plan…then unknown
Dickinson creatively broke the grammar rules, hang her thoughts and images in the idle and disconnect objects just like her lines here. She made a unique and silent scene and image by displaying words with fragmental grammar checking.
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最后进行编辑的是 星子 on 星期六 三月 17, 2007 7:53 am, 总计第 1 次编辑
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老哈[老哈]
老哈作品集

八品县丞
(又一个不小心,升了!)
八品县丞<BR>(又一个不小心,升了!)


注册时间: 2006-02-27
帖子: 60
来自: NEVADA, USA

帖子发表于: 星期四 三月 15, 2007 10:54 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

Come on, keep going......
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掠过天堂刹那间的感觉
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星子[ANNA]
星子作品集

酷我!I made it!
酷我!I made it!


注册时间: 2004-06-05
帖子: 13192
来自: Toronto

帖子发表于: 星期四 三月 15, 2007 10:59 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

Sorry. I am so busy. I cannot focus on it now...

and also I fear to make mistakes...

But don't worry, whenever I have nothing, I still have my courage.
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anna[星子安娜]
anna作品集

Site Admin


注册时间: 2004-05-02
帖子: 7141

帖子发表于: 星期五 三月 16, 2007 4:49 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

回老哈,,,斗胆写了一段,,,请指教!
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com
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不清[不清]
不清作品集

二品总督
(刚入二品,小心做人)
二品总督<BR>(刚入二品,小心做人)


注册时间: 2006-03-22
帖子: 1364

帖子发表于: 星期五 三月 16, 2007 10:26 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

Anna,

Nice intro to a poet.

(her name is Dickinson, not Dickson) Very Happy
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anna[星子安娜]
anna作品集

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注册时间: 2004-05-02
帖子: 7141

帖子发表于: 星期五 三月 16, 2007 10:46 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

回头读读....OOPS...

THANKS
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com


最后进行编辑的是 anna on 星期四 三月 22, 2007 3:17 pm, 总计第 1 次编辑
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老哈[老哈]
老哈作品集

八品县丞
(又一个不小心,升了!)
八品县丞<BR>(又一个不小心,升了!)


注册时间: 2006-02-27
帖子: 60
来自: NEVADA, USA

帖子发表于: 星期六 三月 17, 2007 1:35 am    发表主题: 引用并回复

It must take personal uniqueness to produce unique work. But I also remember Tolstoy once wrote, "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." Every unique life reflects some down side.
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星子[ANNA]
星子作品集

酷我!I made it!
酷我!I made it!


注册时间: 2004-06-05
帖子: 13192
来自: Toronto

帖子发表于: 星期一 三月 19, 2007 9:21 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

Every unique life reflects some down side...

I disgree with lao ha.

I don't believe perfect life exists. Every kind of life has some phases on its down side. Sometimes it is a good thing when you get through it and looking back, you will understand better yourself and others.

As human, we are always on the way to search... life's meaning or self awaring... On the journey a lot give up the searching, others stick on it.

I guess me one of the latter.
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老哈[老哈]
老哈作品集

八品县丞
(又一个不小心,升了!)
八品县丞<BR>(又一个不小心,升了!)


注册时间: 2006-02-27
帖子: 60
来自: NEVADA, USA

帖子发表于: 星期三 三月 21, 2007 11:42 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

It's understandable, but......

Take a deep breath first!

Smile
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博弈[Mark]
博弈作品集

二品总督
(刚入二品,小心做人)
二品总督<BR>(刚入二品,小心做人)


注册时间: 2006-09-24
帖子: 1484
来自: San Francisco

帖子发表于: 星期四 三月 22, 2007 2:08 am    发表主题: 引用并回复

you pick a very good example of her poems
the '--' (almost her trademark ;))at the end of each stanza also as a way to connect 'cells'

her choice of words achieve maximum drama in these quatrains, some said

she'd often leave a what I called 'unfinished stanza' after the last line of poem, that's where her quatrain's power, repercussion and charm continue;

when you eye-read her poems a second time (try skipping some words), you always get some thing more, my view
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Sometimes I am busy
Sometimes I am free
In between, there's it
Until I find thee...
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Lake[Lake]
Lake作品集

二品总督
(刚入二品,小心做人)
二品总督<BR>(刚入二品,小心做人)


注册时间: 2006-10-10
帖子: 1341
来自: Sky Blue Water

帖子发表于: 星期四 三月 22, 2007 10:10 am    发表主题: 引用并回复

老哈 写到:
Every unique life reflects some down side.


Agree.

星子 写到:
I don't believe perfect life exists.


Concur.

So in this respect I think you two are talking about the same thing. Laughing

Talking about grammar and punctuation marks, please keep this in mind, Emily Dickinson never prepared her poems for publication, and her editors were faced with a bewildering number of textual problems....nearly all of Dickinson's early editors(with the exception of Mrs Bingham) introduced changes in punctuation, rhyme, stanzaic arrangement, etc. (14 by Emily Dickinson With Selected Criticism)

Thus making her works more readable today? Wink

And I second 博弈"s remarks: the use of dash becomes her trademark.
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星子[ANNA]
星子作品集

酷我!I made it!
酷我!I made it!


注册时间: 2004-06-05
帖子: 13192
来自: Toronto

帖子发表于: 星期四 三月 22, 2007 10:21 am    发表主题: 引用并回复

Thanks Lao Ha, 博弈 and Lake.

I don't agree " Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." I think all is unique...

As for Diskinson's grammar's case, unique thoughts are much valuable than prefect grammar.
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Lake[Lake]
Lake作品集

二品总督
(刚入二品,小心做人)
二品总督<BR>(刚入二品,小心做人)


注册时间: 2006-10-10
帖子: 1341
来自: Sky Blue Water

帖子发表于: 星期四 三月 22, 2007 1:41 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

星子 写到:

As for Diskinson's grammar's case, unique thoughts are much valuable than prefect grammar.


I can also add: ideas are more important than words and sentences.? Smile Cool

As for Diskinson's grammar, it doesn't make me feel wrong; instead it is the omission of certain words that makes her reader read with ambiguity and at the same time read with different interpretations, read to fill in the vacuum...

Acutually, many of her poems are well metered and rhymed, eg.:

There's a certain Slant of light,
Winter Afternoons --
That oppresses, like the Heft
Of Cathedral Tunes --

Heavenly Hurt, it gives us --
We can find no scar,
But internal difference,
Where the Meanings, are --

None may teach it -- Any --
'Tis the Seal Despair --
An imperial affliction
Sent us of the Air --

When it comes, the Landscape listens --
Shadows -- hold their breath --
When it goes, 'tis like the Distance
On the look of Death --

The uniqueness of her punctuation in this one lies in this line:

Where the Meanings, are --

a single comma isolates the "are" at the end of the last line. You must gulp a bit before reading that word, and slightly gasp afterward...
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anna[星子安娜]
anna作品集

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帖子: 7141

帖子发表于: 星期四 三月 22, 2007 3:30 pm    发表主题: 引用并回复

Thanks Lake for sharing.

As for the line,

Where the Meanings, are --

how should I read it if it is in normal order?

I just want to be sure.

Thanks.
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com
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anna[星子安娜]
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帖子发表于: 星期二 三月 27, 2007 11:44 am    发表主题: 引用并回复

After Great Pain, A Formal Feeling Comes
Poem lyrics of After Great Pain, A Formal Feeling Comes by Emily Dickinson.


After great pain, a formal feeling comes
The Nerves sit ceremonious, like Toombs
The stiff Heart questions was it He, that bore,
And Yesterday, or Centuries before?

The Feet, mechanical, go round
Of Ground, or Air, or Ought
A Wooden way
Regardless grown,
A Quartz contentment, like a stone

This is the Hour of Lead
Remembered, if outlived,
As Freezing persons recollect the Snow
First-Chill-then Stupor-then the letting go
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com
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