酷我-北美枫

[kokho]

.
A Cool Autumn Night
-------------------------------
JoycelynXu 2006-9-10 02:28

One brand-new night, the sky
Was veiled in black without
The moon or stars inset,
And the road reflecting the dim light,
Leaving trees shining in green and bright.

This was a classical painting of night
Composing of dynamic characters
And the static pure scene.

Riding around the holy palace;
Listening to lovely schoolmates’ talks;
Breathing a fresh breath in depth;
Indulging myself into the scenery enjoyment;
Singing an excited song for all.

This was a cool autumn night in early September,
On the novel campus I haven’t been ever,
The memorable feeling engraved forever.


问好
这看到了，一个汉文的思考，写出来的英文诗。。。


(This piece is an example of how a passage is penned with a Chinese poetic-semantic structure, thus it look strange in the
eyes of native English reader. I will demonstrate how modern
English shall treat the poetic setting provided by the originator.)


I am an overseas Chinese in Singapore....
Let's say I wore both shoes before:))



A Cool Autumn Night
-----------------------------
adapted by Kokho 2006-9-20 03:17 PM


The veil of stars and moon,
vanished; But the freshness of the dark sky,
remains...
witnessed by the green and reflections
of a road as dark!

The statics of silence, thus
paint the character of the night.

Chatters from distance
are exhales from the deep affinity
for the tranquility of the moment...
rhythm is echoed and melody lost!

Exacting the parting
of summer
I inhale September...

) 我把你想说的给诗化了。。。
拿给你的英文老师看看，你就会明白的。

.
_________________
乒乓、摄影、诗歌

[[晓辉]]

.
A Cool Autumn Night
-------------------------------
JoycelynXu 2006-9-10 02:28

One brand-new night, the sky
Was veiled in black without
The moon or stars inset,
And the road reflecting the dim light,
Leaving trees shining in green and bright.

This was a classical painting of night
Composing of dynamic characters
And the static pure scene.

Riding around the holy palace;
Listening to lovely schoolmates’ talks;
Breathing a fresh breath in depth;
Indulging myself into the scenery enjoyment;
Singing an excited song for all.

This was a cool autumn night in early September,
On the novel campus I haven’t been ever,
The memorable feeling engraved forever.


问好
这看到了，一个汉文的思考，写出来的英文诗。。。


(This piece is an example of how a passage is penned with a Chinese poetic-semantic structure, thus it look strange in the
eyes of native English reader. I will demonstrate how modern
English shall treat the poetic setting provided by the originator.)


I am an overseas Chinese in Singapore....
Let's say I wore both shoes before:))



A Cool Autumn Night
-----------------------------
adapted by Kokho 2006-9-20 03:17 PM


The veil of stars and moon,
vanished; But the freshness of the dark sky,
remains...
witnessed by the green and reflections
of a road as dark!

The statics of silence, thus
paint the character of the night.

Chatters from distance
are exhales from the deep affinity
for the tranquility of the moment...
rhythm is echoed and melody lost!

Exacting the parting
of summer
I inhale September...

) 我把你想说的给诗化了。。。
拿给你的英文老师看看，你就会明白的。

.
_________________
乒乓、摄影、诗歌

[kokho]

Wrong posting, may someone be kind enough to transfer
to the English poetry section.


贴错地方了。。那位好心人，帮忙我把贴仔 转到 英文园地 ？

.
_________________
乒乓、摄影、诗歌

[[晓辉]]

Wrong posting, may someone be kind enough to transfer
to the English poetry section.


贴错地方了。。那位好心人，帮忙我把贴仔 转到 英文园地 ？

.
_________________
乒乓、摄影、诗歌

[千山鸿]

转移英文版

[[小明]]

转移英文版

[Lake]

I think the origianl version is pretty descriptive, I get the feel of a "Cool Autumn Night";
but the adapted one really pulls me in with its stong feeling, sentiment.
(I'm pretty sure though, different people have different perceptions of the two versions.)

I can feel it, but I cannot do it.

[[Lake]]

I think the origianl version is pretty descriptive, I get the feel of a "Cool Autumn Night";
but the adapted one really pulls me in with its stong feeling, sentiment.
(I'm pretty sure though, different people have different perceptions of the two versions.)

I can feel it, but I cannot do it.

[kokho]

[[晓辉]]