酷我-北美枫

[anna]

[[星子安娜]]

[anna]

A truly contemporary poem! I am smiling. I am not sure of the three lines at the closing, and here:

Yet, the other day when I sit << I think, 'sat'
in a beauty salon, the song
love at a grocery store
stirred up mocking sighs--
smart, at least, find a cook.
And I agreed, at a bar, only a loser.
I have happy friend couples
who met at a bar

Cute!
Poetema

berniehenrie #2 [-]

Posts: 252
(05/07/10 11:08:25)
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My Recent PostsMessage MeBlockingIgnore User's Posts why LS---

i'm shocked, shocked to find that there is gambling going on in here...I suggest a little more . in your poems and now you make my face turn red.

great!


(Casablanca, scene in Rick's Bar---)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjbPi00k_ME

who would have thunk such a hip, tres moderne pom from you? teach me to sell my friends short. well, i like this poem mightly fine.

i think you did a terrific job finding a great close.



One could imagine
a door ajar
in a waiting room.


bernie
Last Edited By: berniehenrie 05/07/10 11:43:51. Edited 2 times.
poetema #3 [-]

Posts: 53
(05/07/10 11:51:52)
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My Recent PostsMessage MeBlockingIgnore User's Posts That was too short a clip, Bernie! And yes, it is a good ending, Anna. What is the ratio of happiness versus unhappiness in a marriage today? Judging by studies on divorce rate years back, it was 53% in favor of divorce. Not a good bet, but hey, romance is romance is romance, and, there is a poet whose name I do not recall, and whom I dare to, poorly, translate:
"Es locura de amor y poco dura,
mas quien no diera toda la cordura
por ese breve insante de locura."

It is the craze of love and shortlasting, but who would not give all sanity for that brief instant of madness.


lavenderSwing #4 [-]

Posts: 57
(05/07/10 12:12:47)
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My Recent Posts Hi Poetema and Bernie,

Thank you very much for reading and sharing your thoughts.

I wrote this to mock the short love or claimed relationship so easy... just a click.

I seldom use facebook, but each time when I get invite, I am confused who is who...And after you click, you are friends... what kind of friends, I don't know.

I remember once the newspaper headlined, Found True Love in Facebook... Believe it or not, for me, I put the ending, the door ajar and wait... who knows....

I found love in poetry, that I know.



Anna
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com

[[星子安娜]]

A truly contemporary poem! I am smiling. I am not sure of the three lines at the closing, and here:

Yet, the other day when I sit << I think, 'sat'
in a beauty salon, the song
love at a grocery store
stirred up mocking sighs--
smart, at least, find a cook.
And I agreed, at a bar, only a loser.
I have happy friend couples
who met at a bar

Cute!
Poetema

berniehenrie #2 [-]

Posts: 252
(05/07/10 11:08:25)
ReplyQuoteMore
My Recent PostsMessage MeBlockingIgnore User's Posts why LS---

i'm shocked, shocked to find that there is gambling going on in here...I suggest a little more . in your poems and now you make my face turn red.

great!


(Casablanca, scene in Rick's Bar---)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjbPi00k_ME

who would have thunk such a hip, tres moderne pom from you? teach me to sell my friends short. well, i like this poem mightly fine.

i think you did a terrific job finding a great close.



One could imagine
a door ajar
in a waiting room.


bernie
Last Edited By: berniehenrie 05/07/10 11:43:51. Edited 2 times.
poetema #3 [-]

Posts: 53
(05/07/10 11:51:52)
ReplyQuoteMore
My Recent PostsMessage MeBlockingIgnore User's Posts That was too short a clip, Bernie! And yes, it is a good ending, Anna. What is the ratio of happiness versus unhappiness in a marriage today? Judging by studies on divorce rate years back, it was 53% in favor of divorce. Not a good bet, but hey, romance is romance is romance, and, there is a poet whose name I do not recall, and whom I dare to, poorly, translate:
"Es locura de amor y poco dura,
mas quien no diera toda la cordura
por ese breve insante de locura."

It is the craze of love and shortlasting, but who would not give all sanity for that brief instant of madness.


lavenderSwing #4 [-]

Posts: 57
(05/07/10 12:12:47)
ReplyQuoteEditDelMore
My Recent Posts Hi Poetema and Bernie,

Thank you very much for reading and sharing your thoughts.

I wrote this to mock the short love or claimed relationship so easy... just a click.

I seldom use facebook, but each time when I get invite, I am confused who is who...And after you click, you are friends... what kind of friends, I don't know.

I remember once the newspaper headlined, Found True Love in Facebook... Believe it or not, for me, I put the ending, the door ajar and wait... who knows....

I found love in poetry, that I know.



Anna
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com

[anna]

Anna, I'm not sure whether you were aware of this when you wrote your poem, but I was just about to post this in the new set of themes for the coming week.

In October 2010, Iron Horse Literary Review will publish a Facebook Issue. Iron Horse is looking for poems (also stories and essays) "that parody or make use of Facebook paraphernalia—the quizzes (i.e., What Famous Novel Are You? or Have You Done It?), 25 Random Things lists, status updates, profile pictures, any and all things FB. You can write about your FB experiences, as well, but we’ll be wary of those experiences that seem stereotypical or are represented in a stale fashion." Deadline: June 1st. NOTE: 5:00 pm on June 1st.

Send your poem to: Iron Horse Literary Review, The Facebook Issue, English Department, Texas Tech University, Mail Stop 43091, Lubbock, TX 79409-3091.


Toniclark
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com

[[星子安娜]]

Anna, I'm not sure whether you were aware of this when you wrote your poem, but I was just about to post this in the new set of themes for the coming week.

In October 2010, Iron Horse Literary Review will publish a Facebook Issue. Iron Horse is looking for poems (also stories and essays) "that parody or make use of Facebook paraphernalia—the quizzes (i.e., What Famous Novel Are You? or Have You Done It?), 25 Random Things lists, status updates, profile pictures, any and all things FB. You can write about your FB experiences, as well, but we’ll be wary of those experiences that seem stereotypical or are represented in a stale fashion." Deadline: June 1st. NOTE: 5:00 pm on June 1st.

Send your poem to: Iron Horse Literary Review, The Facebook Issue, English Department, Texas Tech University, Mail Stop 43091, Lubbock, TX 79409-3091.


Toniclark
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com

[anna]

[[星子安娜]]

[anna]

I was not sure about the title. (I used Tie, face-click ties... So I asked for suggestion.

Here is some comments.

LS

I've read many contemporary pieces. Which basically means there nothing novel here to me. What is so refreshing about the piece is your timeless finale which gives it that wow factor 99.9% of contemporary free verse lacks bigtime. Most would use something really silly like: like a door ajar... and similes have been flogged to death imo.

Doing as you've done in constructing the piece as such, you've captured the essence of modern life which stacks us ten high upon each other and we still don't know how to communicate with each other intimately.

Tis a very fine and clearly more human example of physics famous Schr&ouml;dinger's cat problemata.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schr&ouml;dinger's_cat


Please do not title it Door Ajar... reason: a door, a jar puns brilliantly in the finale.

best
J
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com

[[星子安娜]]

I was not sure about the title. (I used Tie, face-click ties... So I asked for suggestion.

Here is some comments.

LS

I've read many contemporary pieces. Which basically means there nothing novel here to me. What is so refreshing about the piece is your timeless finale which gives it that wow factor 99.9% of contemporary free verse lacks bigtime. Most would use something really silly like: like a door ajar... and similes have been flogged to death imo.

Doing as you've done in constructing the piece as such, you've captured the essence of modern life which stacks us ten high upon each other and we still don't know how to communicate with each other intimately.

Tis a very fine and clearly more human example of physics famous Schr&ouml;dinger's cat problemata.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schr&ouml;dinger's_cat


Please do not title it Door Ajar... reason: a door, a jar puns brilliantly in the finale.

best
J
_________________
---------------------

Anna Yin

《爱的灯塔-星子安娜双语诗选》
<Nightlights> <Seven Nights with the Chinese Zodiac> ...

http://annapoetry.com