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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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 发表于: 星期四 十二月 04, 2008 10:37 am 发表主题: My Worst Woe (Two Versions, revised) |
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最后进行编辑的是 christine on 星期六 十二月 27, 2008 2:04 pm, 总计第 2 次编辑 |
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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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| 发表于: 星期四 十二月 04, 2008 10:39 am 发表主题: |
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| ericcoliu 写到: |
I Wash My Face as Usual
I gazed in the mirror.
Wrinkles were stamped
deeply across my brows.
I saw my worst foe whispering
Who are you?
I gaze in the mirror.
Oblivious to furrowed brows,
I wash my face as usual. |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu]
ericcoliu作品集
二品总督
（刚入二品，小心做人）
注册时间: 2007-05-29
帖子: 1393
来自: GTA, Canada
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| 发表于: 星期四 十二月 04, 2008 5:06 pm 发表主题: Re: My Worst Foe |
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| christine 写到: |
Note:
I warn you that My Worst Foe is not an Eric-esque poem.
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A poignant poem on Time with an Eric-esque thought-evoking title, which I like immensely.
Time is our tragedy
_________________
Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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Champagne[Champagne]
Champagne作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-09-15
帖子: 394
来自: Nowhere & Everywhere
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| 发表于: 星期五 十二月 05, 2008 3:10 pm 发表主题: Re: My Worst Foe |
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| christine 写到: | My Worst Foe
birth, disease, old age
and death
mark Time
I warn you that My Worst Foe is not an Eric-esque poem. |
Definitely, it's not Eric-esque but Buddhist.
_________________
I'm Champagne,
Bottled poetry with sparkling joy. |
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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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| 发表于: 星期六 十二月 06, 2008 1:49 pm 发表主题: Re: My Worst Foe |
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| ericcoliu 写到: |
A poignant poem on Time with an Eric-esque thought-evoking title, which I like immensely.
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Yes, the title only. |
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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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| 发表于: 星期六 十二月 06, 2008 1:51 pm 发表主题: Re: My Worst Foe |
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| Champagne 写到: |
Definitely, it's not Eric-esque but Buddhist. |
Champagne,
I must say that you failed in grasping the main theme explored in my poem. |
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fanfan[FAFAFA]
fanfan作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-12-27
帖子: 353
来自: Canada
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| 发表于: 星期一 十二月 08, 2008 9:03 am 发表主题: Re: My Worst Foe |
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| christine 写到: |
I must say that you failed in grasping the main theme explored in my poem. |
I concur!
Yourpoem reminds me of the sentiment revealed in Childe Harold's Pilgrimage by George Byron:
What is the worst of woes that wait on age?
......
To view each loved one blotted from life's page,
And be alone on earth, as I am now.
Below is my take on this pressing issue:
Breath
I
Live with the living,
die with the dead;
here he is – limbo.
II
Even Jesus once lay
six feet under,
why are you struggling?
III
Living or dying,
I’m striving for
spaces in between.
_________________
Don't imitate me;
it's as boring
as the two halves of a melon. |
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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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| 发表于: 星期五 十二月 12, 2008 1:53 pm 发表主题: |
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I like Byron's poem. Thanks for your poetic reply.
| fanfan 写到: |
Yourpoem reminds me of the sentiment revealed in Childe Harold's Pilgrimage by George Byron:
What is the worst of woes that wait on age?
......
To view each loved one blotted from life's page,
And be alone on earth, as I am now.
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My favorite lines. |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu]
ericcoliu作品集
二品总督
（刚入二品，小心做人）
注册时间: 2007-05-29
帖子: 1393
来自: GTA, Canada
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| 发表于: 星期六 十二月 13, 2008 9:12 am 发表主题: Re: My Worst Foe |
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| christine 写到: |
in and out of
my mind
Time slips
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Might be
in and out of my mind
my life
Time slips
Below is my another take on this pressing issue:
Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter, And ……
Cherry blossoms, summer showers
the harvest moon and snowscapes
mark Time
In and out of
my mind and life
Time slips
Note:
Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter, And …… , is my Christine-esque reply to My Worst Woe.
I declare under penalty of perjury that the foregoing is true and correct and that this declaration was executed on Dec., 19.
_________________
Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul
最后进行编辑的是 ericcoliu on 星期日 十二月 21, 2008 4:47 pm, 总计第 5 次编辑 |
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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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| 发表于: 星期六 十二月 20, 2008 4:18 pm 发表主题: |
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| Thanks for your suggestion. I've revised my poem. |
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浴恩福[浴恩福]
浴恩福作品集
六品通判
（官儿做大了，保持廉洁哦）
注册时间: 2008-05-08
帖子: 123
来自: 多倫多
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| 发表于: 星期六 十二月 27, 2008 2:31 pm 发表主题: |
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May I ask why both of you capitalize Time?
The temporal sense experienced by the narrator in My worst Woe is linear while it's cyclical in Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter, And …
_________________
報三恩、耕三大福田 |
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