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Champagne[Champagne]
Champagne作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-09-15
帖子: 394
来自: Nowhere & Everywhere
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 发表于: 星期五 七月 11, 2008 4:39 pm 发表主题: Alone in the Night co-authored with ericcoliu (Xiaoshi) |
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Alone in the Night co-authored with ericcoliu (Xiaoshi)
A blade of grass
bending in the breeze.
A small boat
floating on a calm lake.
The moon’s shadow
tossed about in the water.
A solitary crow
lost in the sky.
_________________
I'm Champagne,
Bottled poetry with sparkling joy.
最后进行编辑的是 Champagne on 星期日 十月 12, 2008 7:47 am, 总计第 1 次编辑 |
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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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| 发表于: 星期六 七月 12, 2008 9:58 am 发表主题: |
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Another version of your Xiaoshi,Lost, which is posted at http://www.coviews.com/viewtopic.php?t=38101
Lost
Rosy clouds in the sky,
Lone man by a lake;
Ripped shadow on the water,
Howling cries toward the clouds. |
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Champagne[Champagne]
Champagne作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-09-15
帖子: 394
来自: Nowhere & Everywhere
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| 发表于: 星期六 七月 12, 2008 10:44 pm 发表主题: |
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| christine 写到: | Another version of your Xiaoshi,Lost
Lost
Rosy clouds in the sky,
Lone man by a lake;
Ripped shadow on the water,
Howling cries toward the clouds.
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Really? Please read them carefully and thoroughly. I believe you’ll find out that they are written in different POVs, and that there is no human figure in Alone in the Night.
_________________
I'm Champagne,
Bottled poetry with sparkling joy. |
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温暖的水獸[温暖的水獸]
温暖的水獸作品集
五品知州
（再努力一把就是四品大员了！）
注册时间: 2008-04-23
帖子: 153
来自: 水族箱
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| 发表于: 星期一 七月 14, 2008 12:25 pm 发表主题: |
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[quote="Champagne"]
| christine 写到: | Another version of your Xiaoshi,Lost
Really? Please read them carefully and thoroughly. I believe you’ll find out that they are written in different POVs, and that there is no human figure in Alone in the Night. |
The emotions expressed in the above-mentioned poems are linked to the natural world.
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舌頭那匹温暖的水獸 馴養地在小小的水族箱中 蠕動
那獸說：是的 我願意 |
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Champagne[Champagne]
Champagne作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-09-15
帖子: 394
来自: Nowhere & Everywhere
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| 发表于: 星期一 七月 14, 2008 8:47 pm 发表主题: |
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| 温暖的水獸 写到: |
The emotions expressed in the above-mentioned poems are linked to the natural world. |
Yes, I think it's an essential part of Chinese poetic tradition in which poets make the natural world an expression of human emotion.
_________________
I'm Champagne,
Bottled poetry with sparkling joy. |
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christine[christine]
christine作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2008-02-25
帖子: 304
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| 发表于: 星期三 七月 16, 2008 7:01 pm 发表主题: |
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| Champagne 写到: |
Really? Please read them carefully and thoroughly. I believe you’ll find out that they are written in different POVs, and that there is no human figure in Alone in the Night. |
Upon the second reading of your poem, I found that it echoes Du Fu's A NIGHT ABROA, especially the first half of it.
杜甫
旅夜書懷
細草微風岸， 危檣獨夜舟。
星垂平野闊， 月湧大江流。
名豈文章著， 官應老病休。
飄飄何所似， 天地一沙鷗。
A NIGHT ABROAD
A light wind is rippling at the grassy shore....
Through the night, to my motionless tall mast,
The stars lean down from open space,
And the moon comes running up the river.
...If only my art might bring me fame
And free my sick old age from office! --
Flitting, flitting, what am I like
But a sand-snipe in the wide, wide world! |
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Lake[Lake]
Lake作品集
二品总督
（刚入二品，小心做人）
注册时间: 2006-10-10
帖子: 1341
来自: Sky Blue Water
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| 发表于: 星期三 七月 16, 2008 11:30 pm 发表主题: |
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| christine 写到: |
Upon the second reading of your poem, I found that it echoes Du Fu's A NIGHT ABROA, especially the first half of it.
杜甫
旅夜書懷
細草微風岸， 危檣獨夜舟。
星垂平野闊， 月湧大江流。
名豈文章著， 官應老病休。
飄飄何所似， 天地一沙鷗。
A NIGHT ABROAD
A light wind is rippling at the grassy shore....
Through the night, to my motionless tall mast,
The stars lean down from open space,
And the moon comes running up the river.
...If only my art might bring me fame
And free my sick old age from office! --
Flitting, flitting, what am I like
But a sand-snipe in the wide, wide world! |
 Me, too. And the last 2 lines 飄飄何所似， 天地一沙鷗
two other versions:
..., blown hither
And yon; I am like a gull
Lost between heaven and earth. (KR)
..., adrift
On the wind - is there anything like it? All
Heaven and earth, and one lone sand-gull. (DH) |
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Champagne[Champagne]
Champagne作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-09-15
帖子: 394
来自: Nowhere & Everywhere
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| 发表于: 星期四 七月 17, 2008 8:52 pm 发表主题: |
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| Lake 写到: |
| christine 写到: |
Upon the second reading of your poem, I found that it echoes Du Fu's A NIGHT ABROA, especially the first half of it.
杜甫
旅夜書懷
細草微風岸， 危檣獨夜舟。
星垂平野闊， 月湧大江流。
名豈文章著， 官應老病休。
飄飄何所似， 天地一沙鷗。
A NIGHT ABROAD
A light wind is rippling at the grassy shore....
Through the night, to my motionless tall mast,
The stars lean down from open space,
And the moon comes running up the river.
...If only my art might bring me fame
And free my sick old age from office! --
Flitting, flitting, what am I like
But a sand-snipe in the wide, wide world! |
Me, too. And the last 2 lines 飄飄何所似， 天地一沙鷗
two other versions:
..., blown hither
And yon; I am like a gull
Lost between heaven and earth. (KR)
..., adrift
On the wind - is there anything like it? All
Heaven and earth, and one lone sand-gull. (DH) |
Thank Lake and Christine for your thoughtful responses.
Yes, Du Fu's inspired my writing.
_________________
I'm Champagne,
Bottled poetry with sparkling joy. |
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Lake[Lake]
Lake作品集
二品总督
（刚入二品，小心做人）
注册时间: 2006-10-10
帖子: 1341
来自: Sky Blue Water
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| 发表于: 星期四 七月 17, 2008 9:40 pm 发表主题: |
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Champagne,
If your poem reminds a reader of other poets or poems, it means you have achieved something.
Best,
lake |
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Champagne[Champagne]
Champagne作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-09-15
帖子: 394
来自: Nowhere & Everywhere
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| 发表于: 星期五 七月 18, 2008 7:19 pm 发表主题: |
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| Lake 写到: |
If your poem reminds a reader of other poets or poems, it means you have achieved something.
Best,
lake |
Hi! lake:
Thank you very much your encouraging words.
| Lake 写到: |
..., adrift
On the wind - is there anything like it? All
Heaven and earth, and one lone sand-gull. (DH) |
By the way, what does DH stand for ? Whose translation ?
_________________
I'm Champagne,
Bottled poetry with sparkling joy. |
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Lake[Lake]
Lake作品集
二品总督
（刚入二品，小心做人）
注册时间: 2006-10-10
帖子: 1341
来自: Sky Blue Water
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| 发表于: 星期六 七月 19, 2008 10:51 pm 发表主题: |
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| Champagne 写到: |
..., adrift
On the wind - is there anything like it? All
Heaven and earth, and one lone sand-gull. (DH) |
By the way, what does DH stand for ? Whose translation ?[/quote]
KR - Kenneth Rexroth
DH - David Hinton |
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Champagne[Champagne]
Champagne作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-09-15
帖子: 394
来自: Nowhere & Everywhere
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| 发表于: 星期日 七月 20, 2008 10:23 am 发表主题: |
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Thank you for your valuable information regarding David Hinton’s translation with which I’m not familiar.
After having googled his translation work, I found out his website, DAVID HINTON Poetry and Ancient China in Translation, which offers some of his translations of ancient Chinese poetry and philosophy and his view of deep ecology and environmental thought.
_________________
I'm Champagne,
Bottled poetry with sparkling joy. |
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