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fanfan[FAFAFA]
fanfan作品集
四品府丞
（封疆大吏也！）
注册时间: 2007-12-27
帖子: 353
来自: Canada
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 发表于: 星期四 十二月 27, 2007 11:10 pm 发表主题: |
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| Lake 写到: |
To provide more information on this form:
A cinquain is a five-line stanza of syllabic verse
with lines containing
1 - two syllables
2 - four syllables
3 - six syllables
4 - eight syllables
5 - two syllables
As a cinquain chain, the beginning of the second stanza picks up the last line of the first stanza and the third stanza picks up the last line of the second stanza and ends with the first line of the first stanza.
Sometimes, I like to play with different forms to sharpen my skill. So this one is a play of form, too.
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Thanks for your detailed information on the writing of cinquain chain. I learn something new and valuable.
| Lake 写到: |
Here is a rewrite, see if it makes more sense.
Haiku -
Chan from China
flourishing in Japan
a seventeen-mora verse
short form
short form
with Zen insight
gained from our daily life
and nature…a seed cracks at that
moment
moment
enlightens us
trees push their way through rocks
an epiphany rises in
haiku
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I like the revised one.
| Lake 写到: |
and nature…a seed cracks at that
moment
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Your attentive ear is constantly turned towards the cracking sound of a seed. For example, “a seed cracking in rhythms” in your The Lost Garden.
_________________
Don't imitate me;
it's as boring
as the two halves of a melon. |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu]
ericcoliu作品集
二品总督
（刚入二品，小心做人）
注册时间: 2007-05-29
帖子: 1393
来自: GTA, Canada
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| 发表于: 星期二 九月 30, 2008 5:48 pm 发表主题: |
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The shortest and simplest possible chain of explanatory Cinquains on haiku, a poetic echo to Adelaide Crapsey’s aspiration.
And furthermore, a rebuttal to the following challenging question:
Challenge
So why
Discuss cinquain
With poets of haiku...
Or speak of any other poem
At all?
_________________
Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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