Write to myself
星期五 二月 22, 2008 10:20 pm
Today I felt sad. The reason I could not say but I really wanted to talk with someone.
In the past year, when my emotion was down to the bottom. I always tried to find friends to talk, or to write.
But today, it is a difficult issue to discuss with others. No body could really feel what I felt. So it made worse. I tried very hard to work on my project. I tried to distract myself. Then I got email from a friend, suddenly it made my day. In his email, my friend would like to co-author a book with me; he thought it would be an exciting and thrilling project to do together.
I never met him and never talked with him before. We only exchanged poetry and thoughts occasionally. So today I searched his web site to read his poems and his arts. I found them powerful and beautiful!
So I decide to contact him for his proposal. I also thank Danish for his book which he gave me as gift. It is very good. I read the beauty and power in it.
In his book, he made a promise to change the reader's life. But he also asked for a promise from the reader: Promise you’ll read it slowly and think about everything you read. Promise you’ll read it several times over. Promise you’ll try to extract all the positive aspects from it. So I made my promise to read it slowly and carefully.
I really got his point of distinction. And I agree with Anthony Robbins’ view about the six basic human needs.
The first human need that Robbins identifies is the need for certainty; the second is the need for uncertainty.
True, I personally experience this deeply. I agree we want to feel certain about the connection we have with someone. However, to continue to feel good, we have a need for variety. I remember a few years ago, when I felt my life was like that what I lived before, no magic ahead, nothing new, plain and calm, I felt so sad. I felt it horrible.
I envisioned myself already half in the coffin. So I wanted changes, I wanted variety. I wanted a new life. Later I began to write and got my passion and lived my dreams.
From time to time, I do feel lonely and helpless. When I feel sad and lonely, I know there are a few friends always open to me, I wish I could talk with them, but sometimes I hold back since I don’t want to disturb others’ life. I believe I need to face loneliness and sadness by myself. Like now, I talk to myself and write to myself, it makes me more strong and calm. I thank people who walk with me and help me; I know my world will be completed by us together. As human, we all connect. Now I write to myself, or maybe to you too, who know? Or I pretend there is someone waiting for me, listening to me?
In my heart, Am I still searching, dreaming . . .
For good or for bad.
I told myself remember the good, forget the bad.
