酷我-北美枫

语风万里

叫板译诗,请多指教。谢谢！

《武陵春》李清照

风住尘香花已尽，日晚倦梳头。
物是人非事事休，欲语泪先流。

闻说双溪春尚好，也拟泛轻舟。
只恐双溪舴艋舟，载不动，许多愁。

Wulingchun by Qingzhao Li

dust scent leave and flower fade when wind cease,
wearily comb my hair sunset time.
'cause goods remain but soul change with things rest,
desire to narrate mood of mine tear drop before.

learn spring still nice at the twin rivulet,
also plan to float on by skiff.
nothing but fear rowing the shallop in the twin rivulet,
so as to could't carry,
worries too lot.
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漫是星光，曲水流觞，一肚花雕眼迷茫。

风过回廊，似歌吟唱，半院黄花满院香。

星子 · 发表于: 星期五七月 30, 2004 10:47 pm 发表主题:

flowers fall into dust and scent disperses when wind cease,
I comb my hair alone at sunset moment.
with thoughts of things remained but soul changed,
all ending;
without speech, my tear drop along.

learning spring still charming along the twin rivulet,
I want to row there by a shallop.
but fear of the weight of my worries,
so heavy to carry,
I sigh in vain.

-------继续交流---有请秋叶才子指教。。。

语风万里 · 发表于: 星期六七月 31, 2004 1:45 am 发表主题:

_________________
漫是星光，曲水流觞，一肚花雕眼迷茫。

风过回廊，似歌吟唱，半院黄花满院香。

晓鸣 · 发表于: 星期六七月 31, 2004 11:19 am 发表主题:

好好! 论坛的真正亮点,也就是前途所在,是在东西方文化交流. 汉译英是重点之重点. 希望各位的努力能把水库捅个洞, 把洪水引出来!

秋叶 · 发表于: 星期六七月 31, 2004 2:01 pm 发表主题:

叶子 · 发表于: 星期六七月 31, 2004 6:51 pm 发表主题:

Wind ceases left with flower petals in the scented dust
Wearily combing my hair in the dusk
All reserved but heart changed, everything has to end
Tears drop down before speeches sound

Heard from the twin rivers that the spring remains
Planning to row there by a shallop
Only its puniness cannot carry the weight, of mine
Infinite sorrows.

星子 · 发表于: 星期六七月 31, 2004 11:13 pm 发表主题:

叶子译的不错。。。
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何兆龙 · 发表于: 星期五十二月 24, 2004 10:50 pm 发表主题: 日晚

我也觉得叶子老师译得最有词味。只是“日晚倦梳头”我觉得应该是说日头很高了，不一定是“SUNSET”。

李智强 · 发表于: 星期六三月 05, 2005 4:43 am 发表主题:

呵呵，很好，很好。（其实我不懂英语啊）
扁我来啊``Come on!
_________________
诗歌后学，小教先生。莆阳小生，兴化学子。
...要当神探，首先必须具备一流的犯罪头脑...
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