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ericcoliu[ericcoliu] ericcoliu作品集 二品总督 (刚入二品,小心做人)
注册时间: 2007-05-29 帖子: 1393 来自: GTA, Canada
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发表于: 星期四 七月 24, 2008 8:40 pm 发表主题: Behind the Photo (Poem Sequence) |
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Reading, Writing, and Life on the Page
Behind the Photo (Poem Sequence)
(I’ve posted Poem II before and added Poem I to form a poem sequence based on Chinese poetics)
I
Gazing at the photo from a dim past
Lingering shadows of reality emerge
I am captivated by the moment
A high-pitched F-word in Mandarin
Suddenly snatches me back
The moment is gone
I continue walking down Spadina Avenue
II
I wish I were you
A smiling graduation photo
Forever frozen
In a glorious moment
But I go on living
In gravity-defying thought
A plastic bag
Whirled by the wind
Struggling in mid-air
Note:
Spadina Avenue is one of the most prominent streets in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. At Dundas Street West and Spadina Avenue is the centre of Toronto's oldest Chinatown. With its multitude of restaurants, shops, and fruit markets catering to generations of Chinese, it is the most visible symbol of this dynamic community. On weekends especially, the sidewalks are crammed with open-air food stalls, vendors, and thousands of bustling people from all backgrounds eager to shop, eat, and socialize. _________________ Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu] ericcoliu作品集 二品总督 (刚入二品,小心做人)
注册时间: 2007-05-29 帖子: 1393 来自: GTA, Canada
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发表于: 星期四 七月 24, 2008 8:42 pm 发表主题: |
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According to classical Chinese poetics, a poem sequence is a group of poems by one poet or perhaps by two or even more poets intended to be read together in a specific order. The integrity of a poem sequence is dependent on this prescribed order of presentation. A poem sequence by a single author is sustained throughout by a single voice and point of view, and it shows consistency in style and purpose from one poem to the next. The defining characteristic of a poem sequence is that each poem must have its own value and integrity yet contribute to the artistic wholeness of the sequence while keeping the logical progression of events. _________________ Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu] ericcoliu作品集 二品总督 (刚入二品,小心做人)
注册时间: 2007-05-29 帖子: 1393 来自: GTA, Canada
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发表于: 星期五 七月 25, 2008 2:37 pm 发表主题: |
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Here are the replies from my fellow poets at Poetry Connection:
Hi eric, I love that you are introducing new poetic techniques to this site. I didn't see #I before it was removed for revision so without it, I think it impossible to judge the "sequential poem" which you explain.
BUT, #2 is a lyrical stand alone poem that again brings understanding as well as a connection between poet and reader. I loved it. I can't wait to read revised #I.
~~Tink
ericcoliu this was terrific! Two poems interelating to one photo. Both seperate yet both connected. Wonderful!
-- fader _________________ Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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christine[christine] christine作品集 四品府丞 (封疆大吏也!)
注册时间: 2008-02-25 帖子: 304
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发表于: 星期六 七月 26, 2008 12:17 pm 发表主题: |
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ericcoliu 写到: |
Here are the replies from my fellow poets at Poetry Connection:
Hi eric, I love that you are introducing new poetic techniques to this site. I didn't see #I before it was removed for revision so without it, I think it impossible to judge the "sequential poem" which you explain.
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Me too. Thanks very much.
I like poem II. Its second stanza puts me directly back to American Beauty's famous scene regarding the whirled plastic bag struggling in mid-air. |
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christine[christine] christine作品集 四品府丞 (封疆大吏也!)
注册时间: 2008-02-25 帖子: 304
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发表于: 星期六 七月 26, 2008 12:22 pm 发表主题: |
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ericcoliu 写到: |
A poem sequence by a single author is sustained throughout by a single voice and point of view, and it shows consistency in style and purpose from one poem to the next. The defining characteristic of a poem sequence is that each poem must have its own value and integrity yet contribute to the artistic wholeness of the sequence while keeping the logical progression of events. |
In my view, your poem sequence shows its consistency in viewpoint and style from one poem to the next. But, I'm not sure of its consistency in purpose or theme. |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu] ericcoliu作品集 二品总督 (刚入二品,小心做人)
注册时间: 2007-05-29 帖子: 1393 来自: GTA, Canada
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发表于: 星期六 七月 26, 2008 4:59 pm 发表主题: |
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christine 写到: |
I like poem II. Its second stanza puts me directly back to American Beauty's famous scene regarding the whirled plastic bag struggling in mid-air. |
Yes, a discerning eye for my poem.
The scene is an important part of visual resources which inspire me to write my poem sequence. _________________ Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu] ericcoliu作品集 二品总督 (刚入二品,小心做人)
注册时间: 2007-05-29 帖子: 1393 来自: GTA, Canada
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发表于: 星期六 七月 26, 2008 5:03 pm 发表主题: |
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christine 写到: |
In my view, your poem sequence shows its consistency in viewpoint and style from one poem to the next. But, I'm not sure of its consistency in purpose or theme. |
The purpose of my poem sequence focuses primarily on "memory work" that is a process of engaging with the past which has both an ethical and historical dimension. _________________ Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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dundas[dundas] dundas作品集 五品知州 (再努力一把就是四品大员了!)
注册时间: 2008-02-23 帖子: 214
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发表于: 星期一 七月 28, 2008 12:52 pm 发表主题: Re: Behind the Photo (Poem Sequence) |
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ericcoliu 写到: |
I
Gazing at the photo from a dim past
Lingering shadows of reality emerge
I am captivated by the moment
A high-pitched F-word in Mandarin
Suddenly snatches me back
The moment is gone
I continue walking down Spadina Avenue
II
I wish I were you
A smiling graduation photo
Forever frozen
In a glorious moment
But I go on living
In gravity-defying thought A plastic bag
Whirled by the wind
Struggling in mid-air
Note:
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The forces of push and pull!
In my view, I remember therefore I am. _________________ My throat knew thirst before the structure
Of skin and vein around the well |
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东西[东西] 东西作品集 八品县丞 (又一个不小心,升了!)
注册时间: 2008-06-07 帖子: 53 来自: East_West
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发表于: 星期二 七月 29, 2008 12:24 pm 发表主题: Re: Behind the Photo (Poem Sequence) |
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dundas 写到: |
ericcoliu 写到: |
II
I wish I were you
A smiling graduation photo
Forever frozen
In a glorious moment
But I go on living
In gravity-defying thought A plastic bag
Whirled by the wind
Struggling in mid-air
Note:
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The forces of push and pull!
In my view, I remember therefore I am. |
This poem sequence makes alive the idea that memory work can take the form of art and recollection can be the foundation of one's being and a guide to living one's live. _________________ East is East, and West is West, and never the twain shall meet. |
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ericcoliu[ericcoliu] ericcoliu作品集 二品总督 (刚入二品,小心做人)
注册时间: 2007-05-29 帖子: 1393 来自: GTA, Canada
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发表于: 星期日 八月 03, 2008 10:04 am 发表主题: Re: Behind the Photo (Poem Sequence) |
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东西 写到: |
dundas 写到: |
ericcoliu 写到: |
II
I wish I were you
A smiling graduation photo
Forever frozen
In a glorious moment
But I go on living
In gravity-defying thought A plastic bag
Whirled by the wind
Struggling in mid-air
Note:
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The forces of push and pull!
In my view, I remember therefore I am. |
This poem sequence makes alive the idea that memory work can take the form of art and recollection can be the foundation of one's being and a guide to living one's live. |
Yes, well said.
This poem sequence is my first attempt to re-examine the inevitable inner tension between and mutual influence by things past and present. _________________ Time is nothing but a disquiet of the soul |
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