酷我-北美枫

林溪 · 发表于: 星期六十一月 06, 2004 5:23 am 发表主题: Imagine my hometown

*Imagine my hometown

Imagine the relatives of my hometown
Get up with the sun
In the early wind
defend the green crop

Imagine the verdancy of the crop
It''s like my childhood
In the evening dew,it are growing
In the sleeping dreams
My nelative laugh laudly

Imagine the laughter
From the surrounding of the small house
to the bank of the river
Woke the love of fish up

Imagine the relative of my hometown
Wake up with smile
After the sunrise
I''m very wistful

*想像故乡
　
想像故乡的亲人
与太阳一同起床
在晨风中
守护着青青的庄稼

想像那些庄稼的青
多像我的童年
在夜露中拔节
亲人在睡梦中
笑出声来

想像那些笑声
从小屋的周围
一直荡到河堤上
惊醒了鱼的爱情

想像故乡的亲人
带着笑声起床
在太阳升起之后
我望穿了自己的眼睛

*Fourteen lines in autumn

I''d like to hug the boiling seasons
On the shoulders of the villege,I''m like my father
Looking at the golden rice fields. I''m insomnious

The sun won''t hurt the innolents any longer
The moon won''t be shy without reason
I''m been on your sitting by me
I''m seated on the river bank,or on the bridge

The river is running calmly
Leaves are floating from distanle
Enthusiastic smile is flybsown by water

father doesn''t keep silent any more
A big bird is flying from the down stream
My arms have taken on eating my own words

*秋天十四行

我要拥抱这滚烫的季节
在村庄的肩膀上，学着父亲
望着金色的稻田失眠

太阳不再伤害无辜者
月亮也再不会无端端地害羞
我要你坐在我的身旁
我坐在河岸，或者桥上

河水安静地流淌
叶子不断地从远方漂来
火红火红的笑沾满了水

父亲不再沉默不语
我的村庄不再沉默不语
一只大鸟从下游飞来
我的双臂患上失语

林溪 · 发表于: 星期六十一月 06, 2004 5:24 am 发表主题:

各位帮忙看看有没有什么不对的地方
有的话，请帮忙修改一下
林溪这里给各位施礼了

晓鸣 · 发表于: 星期六十一月 06, 2004 6:03 am 发表主题:

好诗.我的英语不好,也指不出什么.以下供讨论:
1). "it are growing", 可能应为"it is growing";
2). "My nelative" 可能应为 "My relatives";
3). "I''m been on your sitting by me", 语法好象有问题.
.........

请星子,秋叶,金舟,语风,高岸和其他高手改一下.

风动 · 发表于: 星期六十一月 06, 2004 3:29 pm 发表主题:

很美的意境。
喜欢。

星子 · 发表于: 星期日十一月 07, 2004 10:52 pm 发表主题:

Imagine my relatives at hometown
waken up with the sunrise
In the dawn wind
guard the green crop

---------- just my idea

林溪 · 发表于: 星期一十一月 08, 2004 4:24 am 发表主题:

星子 · 发表于: 星期二十一月 09, 2004 4:17 pm 发表主题:

Imagine my relatives at hometown
waken up with sunrise
In the morning wind
guard the green farm

Imagine greenness of the crop
as my fresh childhood
sprouts with night dews
my nelatives laugh loud
in their sweet dreams

Imagine their laughter
From surroundings of the small house
to banks of the river
stirs up the coos of fishes

Imagine my relatives at hometown
Waken up with smile
when I am yearning
for sunrise and my hometown.

林溪 · 发表于: 星期六十一月 20, 2004 9:57 pm 发表主题:

谢谢美女为林溪操刀！